2017 August | Tony White

Relational contact in the Parent interview

Written by Tony White on August 14, 2017 · Leave a Comment

Again it will lead to a sense of feeling heard and feeling some level of relationship building with another person. Read more »

Categories: psychotherapy - Tags: psychotherapy

Tony White’s Blog

Desensitisation and hyper sensitisation

on June 17, 2018

However it also works the other way. If we are in an environment where we have little confrontational input then the Free Child will assume that is going to continue and it will come out more and more so we become hyper sensitised. Read more »

Categories: Personality - Tags: personality

Smothering on the separation scale

on May 20, 2018

However as is the case with human behaviour once the script gets set the person will start to do things that promote the life script even as they protest against it. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: teenager

Symbiosis and identity formation in the teenager

on May 17, 2018

However maybe this is not so true with every adolescent especially the 20% I am referring to. Perhaps there is just not a strong drive or need in this group of people and the assumption that all people have this need is an incorrect assumption. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: anger, teenager

Opposites in the human mind

on May 13, 2018

People in their desire to be more in control, end up being more out of control. Paradoxically the more you let self be out of control, the more in control of self you will actually be. Read more »

Categories: psychotherapy - Tags: personality

Children and emotional situations

on May 12, 2018

When a child is in a new and unknown situation that is emotionally charged it will try and read how mother is emotionally reacting in its attempt to get a base line for itself. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: children, emotions

Murder suicide

on May 11, 2018

It suggests that murder suicide is really a subtype of suicide. That the decision to murder others first, comes as an after thought to the decision to kill self. Read more »

Categories: suicide - Tags: murder suicide, suicide

Suicide and family relationships

on May 10, 2018

If you are working with a suicidal person and their family then you know that at least some members will be supportive of the suicide from their Free Child point of view. Read more »

Categories: suicide - Tags: Ego states, family, Free child, suicide

Play therapy and the aggressive child

on May 8, 2018

In my office I have a dolls house, which I use when I see children and their parents for therapy. I find it can produce valuable information about the psyche of the child. What is going on inside the child’s head at that time. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: child anger, dolls house, play therapy

Working with the rebellious person

on May 8, 2018

Listening to a person talk about how they cut self is stress producing for most people including therapists. The therapist needs to be clear they do not fall into subtly pressuring the client into making the contract due to their own anxieties. Read more »

Categories: self harm, teenager - Tags: rebellious child, self harm, teenager, Transactional analysis

Despair and its treatment

on May 6, 2018

A significant attachment figure was never fully internalised in childhood and thus there is a sense of a hole inside self. The therapist is used by the client to fill that hole. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: attachment, despair, emotions, feelings

The therapist’s role in bringing up sensitive topics in therapy

on May 5, 2018

If one allows the client to avoid it for long periods of time and addresses it in a very a tepid way that may empower the shame. Read more »

Categories: Anorexia - Tags: Anorexia, no suicide contract, self harm, shame, therapy

Confronting magical thinking about suicide

on April 20, 2018

The magical thinking about suicide is that it can result in a relief from one’s pain. Read more »

Categories: suicide - Tags: Ego states, magical thinking, suicide, Transactional analysis

Big feelings and little feelings

on April 11, 2018

Of course big feelings do occur in childhood, sometimes many of them occur and many are not dealt with or resolved as the child cannot articulate its need to do so Read more »

Categories: emotions - Tags: feelings

Teenage conventional thinking

on April 9, 2018

Recent research on what teenagers see as, “What makes a good person”. They were asked to rate the qualities of people who were good people. This indicates teenagers are a conventional group of people in these views. But this seems […] Read more »

Categories: teenager - Tags: rebellion

Wall of trivia

on April 8, 2018

The wall of trivia allows for two people to keep an emotional distance from each other. Read more »

Categories: relationship - Tags: relationship

Treatment of the passive aggressive personality

on April 2, 2018

Provide lots of positive stokes to the PA and work on how they may filter the strokes. Read more »

Categories: Personality - Tags: passive aggressive personality

Developmental problems for the child from the affluent family

on March 25, 2018

The child from the wealthy family is more likely to be left with the question - Who am I? Read more »

Categories: teenager - Tags: depression, identity

Features of rackets

on March 16, 2018

Anger is a distancing emotion it pushes people apart. When people want distance in a relationship anger can be used to achieve this Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: emotions, feelings

Working through scared feelings.

on March 11, 2018

I personally disagree with this. In my view humans are naturally communal beings and we need (are dependent) on others at least to some degree. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: Ego states, feelings, scare, shame, Transactional analysis, working through feelings

Aversion therapy & implied communication in therapy

on March 9, 2018

The goal is to stop the drug use but in the very nature of the treatment one is giving permission to take drugs. Same in the Redecision therapy I use Read more »

Categories: psychotherapy - Tags: Aversion therapy, implied communication, psychotherapy

Unconscious communication in therapy

on March 1, 2018

If the conscious and unconscious want different things always give the client what the unconscious wants. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: unconscious communication

Post suicide fantasy

on February 25, 2018

“I am not one who fears the end of life. I think when it comes it will be a relief. Can finally rest.” Read more »

Categories: suicide - Tags: samsonic, suicide

Redecision therapy reconsidered

on February 2, 2018

An internal LOC is a empowering position. It is saying to the person, you can take charge and change your life. You are the one in control of your life script, feelings and so forth. Read more »

Categories: Theory - Tags: redecision therapy

The shadow

on January 21, 2018

But then after halloween is over that part of us is quickly packed away again safe from our conscious. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: shadow

Why is anger seen as bad

on January 16, 2018

First and foremost anger is always potentially life threatening. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: anger, child development

Parental expectations of children

on January 11, 2018

Research on what parents believe children can do at various ages found significant gaps in parental expectations in some core areas of child psychological development Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: children psychology

Developmental significance of jealousy

on January 10, 2018

If handled correctly by the parents it allows the child to develop out of its primary narcissism and to develop a sense of the worth of others. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: Jealousy

Reverse psychology as a therapeutic approach (and the teenager)

on January 10, 2018

It is imperative a therapist seek to engage with the Free Child of the teenage client. But many therapist's forget this and stay focussed only on the Rebellious Child Read more »

Categories: addiction - Tags: smoking

Nonverbal permissions by default

on January 2, 2018

Permissions can also be given in an implied way. A therapist who listens to a client and accepts a contract is covertly giving the permission to change Read more »

Categories: suicide - Tags: permission, suicide

Depression and suicide

on November 24, 2017

Depression does not cause suicide. However Transactional Analysis can provide a clear theoretical explanation of why one depressed person can be suicidal and another is not even thinking about i Read more »

Categories: suicide - Tags: transactional, transactions

Tony White

TSTA | Psychologist