You know it if you have had it – chemistry. You meet someone and you get that special feeling that is a very strong motivator. You know when you have it but you can’t really describe it. But when you have it, it does not take long to fall in love. The other person is special for some reason and really will always remain that way even after the relationship is long over.
When you meet, they can take your breathe away or you get the heart thumping a bit extra or you can feel the blood run into your ears, face or neck. There is a definite physiological reaction.
Why them and not someone else? One explanation is because this person has a special fit for your life script. A 20 something woman in her life meets a number of men from different walks of life. Ready to have a partner she discovers that the nice, good boys are nice and good but just don’t do it for her. She feels the liking and appeal to them but just no chemistry.
But she also meets men who are risk takers and don’t always follow the rules. She knows this type of man is much more appealing and the chemistry is definately there, she can feel it. And they also fit for her life script. Emotionally “dangerous” men is where her background was and now she has chemistry for the same kind of man. He fits for her life script such that this relationship could advance her life script in the same direction with quite negative outcomes.
What does she do? Realistically she will never be able to change the type of man she has the chemistry for. She could make a sensible and Adult ego state choice and get married for sensible reasons. Some women do this and for others it’s simply not enough. They are not prepared to live such a sensible life but instead need that chemistry to at least some degree in their marriage.
Hence she is left with a dilemma in life. A task to master if she can. How can I pick a man who fits for my life script but be able to turn it around just enough such that my life script is not lived out in a negative way but in a more positive way? Is this a case of having your cake and eating it to, or is it simply unrealistic and just hope speaking?