Maternal motivations and the Don’t be separate injunction

In the life script matrix the injunctions are delivered by the Child ego state of the mother or father to the Child ego state of the son or daughter.

Script matrix Jpeg

Life script matrix


This is because an injunction is usually given out of the parents’ own psychological need. It is often given unconsciously and non verbally by the mother or father. Indeed some injunctions are given to the offspring before they can understand language, known of course as pre verbal injunctions. It is the mother or father’s own anger, fear, shame, despair, anxiety and so on from their own past distressing experiences that are communicated to the son or daughter.

For example parents can give what is known as a Don’t be separate injunction where the mother (or father) communicates to the child that she does not want him or her to leave and separate from her as they grow. She wants the offspring to remain dependent on her and not grow up psychologically. The mother can communicate this to the child a number of ways including by over protection. There has been found to be four common motivators for a mother to tell a child not to separate from her. This shows how the injunction comes from the mother’s own needy Child ego state wants and desires.

Maternal over protection Jpeg

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