empower

Neediness in relationship

Written by Tony White on May 24, 2014 · Leave a Comment

That she chooses needy men just as much as they choose her. Her pattern is not bad luck or some kind of fate. She needs needy men just as much as needy men need her. Read more »

Categories: dependency, psychotherapy, relationship - Tags: dependency, empower, life script, therapy

Tony White’s Blog

Therapist self versus the real self

on January 28, 2019

Also if the therapy and therapist is overly sensitive and gentle then the client will tend to hyper sensitise and become ‘worse’ in that sense Read more »

Categories: psychotherapy - Tags: Ego states, Free child, resilience

Fight, flight or freeze in therapy

on January 19, 2019

The person who flees the scene of an accident or the hit and run driver has the flight response. Read more »

Categories: bully, child development - Tags: fight, flight, freeze, temperament

The bully victim dynamic

on January 18, 2019

As any child therapist knows the ‘client’ is the child and the parent child relationship. They are a package deal. Read more »

Categories: bully, child development - Tags: bully, Transactional analysis

Drugs and danger

on January 7, 2019

You can’t keep lying to a group of people and not expect them to work that out. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: drugs, rock concerts, teenagers

Working with the demon in therapy

on December 29, 2018

As I said, this was the first time we had ever had significant dialogue between me and this part of her. It will be interesting to see over time what happens, especially her reaction to me. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: demon sub personality, self destruction, therapy

Death anxiety

on December 29, 2018

One of the goals in trauma debriefing therapy is to reestablish this contamination in the client so they again begin to lie to themselves their potential mortality. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: contamination, death, Ego state, trauma

Examination of the demon personality

on December 23, 2018

Instead you acknowledge its power in the therapy process and begin talking to it and forming relational contact when and how it wants. You don’t have a choice to do it any other way. As Berne says, it holds all the cards to play at any time it wants. Read more »

Categories: child development, Eating disorder - Tags: demon, therapy

Workshop on the demon sub personality in Kiev.

on December 23, 2018

It is hoped this workshop can happen in the future. And that I can do demonstration leading on the demon in clients for people at the workshop to observe. However that means there will need to be people in the […] Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized

Understanding feelings in others. Is empathy possible?

on December 1, 2018

Empathy is really quite a self involved process that is about self and not the other. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: emotions, empathy, feelings

Make feels and LOC

on December 1, 2018

People with an internal LOC are quite willing to have personal insight to how they may be contributing to their own problems such as their rackets and the games they may play. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: locus of control

Car accident “suicides”

on October 31, 2018

In all that I have read there is never even one mention of people using car crashes as a type of suicide attempt. Read more »

Categories: suicide

Suicide attempt by – “I will get you to kill me”

on October 29, 2018

These are not primarily murders they are primarily suicide attempts. Read more »

Categories: suicide - Tags: death by cop

Belief and thinking

on September 3, 2018

Of course it works the other way as well. “Good” belief systems are also resilient and resistant to change. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: belief system, Ego states, thinking errors, Transactional analysis

Family system drug addict

on August 31, 2018

For a family system drug user it is actually a good thing, as it is easier for the person to eventually stop using the drug. Read more »

Categories: addiction - Tags: addiction, alcohol, drug addiction, family system, munchausen syndrome by proxy

Evidence based psychotherapy

on August 22, 2018

As you can see psychodynamic therapy does quite well. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: psychotherapy, redecision, research, TA

Introjection in psychotherapy

on August 17, 2018

This provides an interesting insight into introjection in this instance. She hasn’t introjected what I have said but instead introjected my voice sound and quality. Then she has applied that introjected voice to her own words. Read more »

Categories: Uncategorized - Tags: counselling, drugs, Ego states, introjection, Transactional analysis

Empathy is magical thinking

on August 12, 2018

Here is a definition of empathy The action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another This represents magical thinking One can only ever feel their own feelings. You can […] Read more »

Categories: emotions - Tags: empathy

Mother and child relationships

on August 10, 2018

Mothers and fathers can generally treat their various children in a similar ways and one could even say equally, but they are not going to feel the same about each of them. Read more »

Categories: Personality - Tags: children, Parenting

Hypnotic induction and ulterior transactions

on July 14, 2018

The importance of emotional catharsis in psychotherapy has been known since the time of Freud. Maybe there are two factors involved in this observation. Yes the expression of feelings can be psychologically beneficial for the client but also the client picks up hypnotic inductions at the same time. Read more »

Categories: psychotherapy - Tags: adult ego state, child ego state, hypnosis, life script

Introjection and the integrated Adult

on June 22, 2018

People are adding new introjections to their Parent ego state continuously through out life as part of normal psychological functioning. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: adult ego state, Ego states, introjection, Transactional analysis

Introjection – two aspects.

on June 21, 2018

The Child ego state develops through early decisions and the Parent ego state develops through introjections. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: introjection

Desensitisation and hyper sensitisation

on June 17, 2018

However it also works the other way. If we are in an environment where we have little confrontational input then the Free Child will assume that is going to continue and it will come out more and more so we become hyper sensitised. Read more »

Categories: Personality - Tags: personality

Smothering on the separation scale

on May 20, 2018

However as is the case with human behaviour once the script gets set the person will start to do things that promote the life script even as they protest against it. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: teenager

Symbiosis and identity formation in the teenager

on May 17, 2018

However maybe this is not so true with every adolescent especially the 20% I am referring to. Perhaps there is just not a strong drive or need in this group of people and the assumption that all people have this need is an incorrect assumption. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: anger, teenager

Opposites in the human mind

on May 13, 2018

People in their desire to be more in control, end up being more out of control. Paradoxically the more you let self be out of control, the more in control of self you will actually be. Read more »

Categories: psychotherapy - Tags: personality

Children and emotional situations

on May 12, 2018

When a child is in a new and unknown situation that is emotionally charged it will try and read how mother is emotionally reacting in its attempt to get a base line for itself. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: children, emotions

Murder suicide

on May 11, 2018

It suggests that murder suicide is really a subtype of suicide. That the decision to murder others first, comes as an after thought to the decision to kill self. Read more »

Categories: suicide - Tags: murder suicide, suicide

Suicide and family relationships

on May 10, 2018

If you are working with a suicidal person and their family then you know that at least some members will be supportive of the suicide from their Free Child point of view. Read more »

Categories: suicide - Tags: Ego states, family, Free child, suicide

Play therapy and the aggressive child

on May 8, 2018

In my office I have a dolls house, which I use when I see children and their parents for therapy. I find it can produce valuable information about the psyche of the child. What is going on inside the child’s head at that time. Read more »

Categories: child development - Tags: child anger, dolls house, play therapy

Working with the rebellious person

on May 8, 2018

Listening to a person talk about how they cut self is stress producing for most people including therapists. The therapist needs to be clear they do not fall into subtly pressuring the client into making the contract due to their own anxieties. Read more »

Categories: self harm, teenager - Tags: rebellious child, self harm, teenager, Transactional analysis

Tony White

TSTA | Psychologist